I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize