I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
