Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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