Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i may or may not be watching the land before time
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
