She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize