ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
