I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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