as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
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