I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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