You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
