I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm passing your future prison.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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