the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
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