Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He? As in you personified your dick?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
