its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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