Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
