come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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