Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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