Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Randomize