Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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