just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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