but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
