Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
