Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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