no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize
