Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
