I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize