if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
honey bunches of taint.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
