You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
