i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
