mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Randomize
