Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
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