Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
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