HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
whose parrot is this?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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