Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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