I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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