I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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