My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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