so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
