i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
