i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Of course I have a pirate flag
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
