My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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