have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
