my vag is so smooth its legendary
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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