Sponge bath it is.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
