real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
