Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
