Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize
