Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
