He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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