Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize